Judy

As many of you have already heard, Trey's Mother, and one of the most incredible women, my biggest supporter and dearest friend passed away December 2nd. She died of bleeding on her brain a few days after neck surgery.
Just stating that she is gone and how she died just doesn't seem right. I don't know if going into why she was so wonderful, and how I don't know what we will do without her, or why I haven't been able to write this till now will help, but I just don't know what else to do. So, I will try to somehow express myself.

To say, she was my "Mother-in-law" never felt right. She was so much more. she was my second Mom, my advocate, my angel who would just show up, or say exactly what I needed, She was one of my closest friends, by business partner/boss, my reminder, the mother and biggest fan of my husband and most incredible Grandmother to my child.
We used to talk several times a week, and almost always, she would remind me of something or think of something that was really important in our lives that I have completely not thought of. She had a focus on us that was amazing and needed and I don't know what we will do without her.

She was adoring, intelligent, capable, so easy to be around and talk to. She was the most generous person I have ever met. I was more spoiled in my 5 years with her than by anyone over my lifetime. She was completely selfless with her time and resources with us.

From the beginning, we could talk for hours on end because we shared the same favorite topic: Trey. Brooklyn naturally made that list and just made our conversations that much more fun!

She was the perfect Mother-in-law and Perfect Grandma/Nai Nai. I have never dared to imagine what life would be like without our her. She was the only other person on earth that looked at Brooklyn the same way Trey and I do. She adored her the way I know she adored her boys. She would always assure me that Brooklyn is brilliant and more beautiful than any other child(; She spoiled her with the most adorable clothes and all her love. I actually never had to buy her clothes! Last visit she showed up with her entire winter wardrobe, then took us shopping at Target for more clothes!

All my friends would say to me "I want a Judy!" or "everyone needs a Judy". I agreed and was so glad I was the one that had her.

When Trey got the call when we were all still in Calgary, Trey ran out the door in less than 5 minutes to board the next plane. Brooklyn and I were left in my parents Condo alone. I couldn't stop sobbing, I just knew she was gone. Brookyln didnt' know what to do, so I sat on the floor and held her to me in a tight hug as I wailed. I was amazed at how still she became and just became the heartbeat I needed to hear as I cried. She just let me hold her and hug her for at least half hour as I sobbed before a Sheila, our friend came over. Over the next few days, she wasn't quite as understanding as she would just say "No more crying Mommy!" every time I would start sobbing again.

When Judy passed away, it felt like there was a lighted path in my life, full of joy and love and memories that was suddenly extinguished. That's just the best way to describe it. As I walk through my days, I think of how I'd like to call her and tell her something, or now that we are here at her house, what I would be saying to her and it is just so heartbreaking and lonely. I miss her so much it hurts. We are now learning to live in the world without her.
This entry is all about me and my feelings, but Trey and Logan just lost their Mom, Fred his wife and helpmeet. She was their Rock and they are dealing with it in thier own ways. Part of the pain is knowing how much they must hurt.
Through this experience I have learned an incredible amount about how to serve and help others in the grieving experinece. The outpouring of love and support has been overwhelming and each call, note and shared tear has been felt and appreciated.

God Bless in the New Year and Thank you for all you have done.